Dork-o-Rama: The Random Thoughts of a Total Goofball

Embracing the Dork Side....Because Life is Too Short to Take Yourself Too Seriously

Monday, April 30, 2007


I have stuff to write about... but no time... and definitely no energy...

Back soon.

EDITED TO ADD: Oh, now I know why we pay those extravagant service charges on concert tickets.

It's so we can get emails with the subject line "Your tickets have been printed!"

(yeah, I'm old school. I like tickets and not paper print-outs.)

Wow. Thanks. I'm so excited about that. I couldn't have gone another day without that information.

Just send me the damn things, okay??

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

How is it...

...that two $35 concert tickets end up costing 93 bucks and change by the end of the transaction??

I. Hate. Ticketmaster.

And all other ticket sellers that charge exorbitant service charges and "convenience fees."

Monday, April 23, 2007


  • Not a bad way to start the week. Ahem.
  • And then I got the news that someone I greatly admired died unexpectedly and that put a big damper on things. I didn't even know Michael Smuin -- I'd met him a couple of times, in a professional capacity -- but I was moved by his artistry (I've written about his ballet company before) and am deeply saddened by his death. All I want to do now is cry.
Perhaps an episode of "Six Feet Under" will help me with that...

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Que bueno!

So I was all set to write about my tax ordeal -- that was mostly of my own making -- but that's boring. Suffice it to say I will never again wait until two days before the deadline to start on my returns. I've never done it before, and I'll never do it again. Yeeek.

So. The guilty pleasure. That would be one Ricky Martin, who I saw in concert again last week. Sigh... Laugh if you must, but he was a pure delight after a late night the night before, and a 10-hour work day. I don't think I can explain how much fun he is on stage. You just have to see him for yourself. He puts on a hell of a show, and it's not just the women (and men) who think he's hot who enjoy it. There's always a very diverse crowd at his shows (the ones I've gone to, anyway) and everyone's having a ball. And now that he's not the most popular thing on the planet, he can do more interesting things in concert... and he did. I'm especially fond of the songs he sings in Spanish, as he just sounds better in his native tongue.

And yeah....he looked good. He knows it, too. He strikes all these poses that are, on the one hand, totally cheesy... but on the other, have their desired effect. Oh BOY. My friend and I kept shaking our heads in amazement every time. And she's not even a big fan, though all she can do now is sigh when anyone asks her about the show. Good times.

Plus, he was awfully sweet to me when I dorked it up all over him a couple of years ago. (This picture sucks, but it doesn't matter.)

Gay... bi.... facial hair or no... stupid thing on his head or not... I don't care! He's more fun than I can say.


Monday, April 16, 2007

Coming soon to a blog near you...

*Adventures in last-minute tax preparation!

*My latest guilty pleasure! (A recurring one, actually.)

*Another appearance by my good friend Cindy, her daughter Sierra, and niece Lindzey!

What I'm saying is I have a huuuuuuuugely busy week ahead -- plus, you know, there's the whole having to go to work thing -- so don't be alarmed if you don't see much dorkiness in the coming days.

Believe me, it's happening in the real world... just not being chronicled in a timely manner here. I'll do my best to keep track of it all.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Why I'm spending this weekend in my PJs...

I won't bore you with all the nuttiness of work over the past couple of weeks -- the very early morning and late night calls, disrupted sleep, etc.

No. Really, I'm just recovering from last weekend. And not just the errands and such.

Saturday night, Michael and I went to the Greek Theatre in Berkeley to see the fabulous Corinne Bailey Rae and John Legend. They were, indeed, both really fabulous. They even teamed up on a classic during his set -- "Where Is The Love?" -- though I think Michael and I may have been the only people there who were old enough to remember that 70's nugget.

Not so fabulous? The lawn at the Greek Theatre. It's very steep. Very. So steep that when I got there, and stood at the top of the lawn (after scaling an seemingly endless series of steps) scoping out seating locations, I realized that that was the only viable place to sit. That, and the bottom of the lawn, and that was full already. As I made the decision not to attempt to sit somewhere on the middle of the hill, a much younger and ostensibly nimbler gent proceeded to fall ONTO SOME OTHER CONCERTGOERS as he and his friends tried to get to a mid-lawn place to sit, confirming the wisdom of my choice.

This would be the theme of the night, watching people fall as they tried to navigate the incredibly steep grade of the lawn. I have a feeling the people who work there have security cameras trained on the lawn and get lots of laughs watching this spectacle. Happily, there was wine, good company, amazing performers, and a lovely view of the bay from the top of the lawn, so it was all good.

Sunday, I hopped on a plane to Vegas. For a day. I know. Sounds crazy, no? Hell, it's a short trip from here and worth the adventure to get to hang out with a Pirate who lives a million miles away but was vacationing in Vegas.

The thing I always forget about Vegas, though, is how long it takes to walk from place to place. Heading to the resort next to yours? It'll take you 15 minutes just to get from your room to the front door of your hotel, as all paths force you to pass through the casinos. And then to get from the front door to the actual street is another trek. It all looks like it's so close together but everything is so friggin' huuuuuuuge, it take forever to get around. Alas, we didn't make it over to the roller coaster at New York, New York...but we did head to the top of the faux Eiffel Tower (I stayed at Paris -- a fabulous hotel) and had dinner next to the faux canal in the Venetian. (Why are there no pictures? I forgot my camera. Dimwit. You'll have to be satisfied with his, once he gets his camera back. See, HE left his camera in Vegas...!) Oh, we even spent time in Margaritaville, talking over some terrible house band that was playing. Here's some advice: when the waitress tells you you've just ordered the strongest marg on the menu, believe her.

The other thing I always forget about Vegas is the cigarette smoke that's everywhere. You can't smoke in bars or restaurants in California, and I forget what it's like in places where it's still legal. My hair reeked of it a couple of hours after my arrival, and I wasn't even near anyone in particular who was smoking. It's just hanging in the air, and in the ventilation systems.

Still, it was great fun and one of the few times in my life I've just gone with an impulse. I need to do that more often.

Where should my next adventure be?

Thursday, April 12, 2007

I know, I know...

I still owe you an explanation about the last post. That's coming, once I have some time.
I just wanted to share these pics with you (see how I'm always thinking of you?).
After all, it's not every day I get to go to Alcatraz for work.
Here, you see the lighthouse, what's left of the warden's house, and the building that was once used as barracks for troops. Alcatraz was a military fort, then a military prison, before it became a federal prison.Part of what's left of the warden's house.
The Bay Bridge. If you look closely, you can see the cruise ships that were in port today.
My city.
The Golden Gate.
Not a bad way to spend a few hours at work, eh?

Monday, April 09, 2007

Who knew....

...that everyone and their brother would be on a plane to Vegas on Easter Sunday???

I sure didn't.

No, I don't have time to explain at the moment.

Friday, April 06, 2007


i want a burger
and fries from the taint. but i
should just have salad
*edited to add: i DID have salad. and not one weighed down by cheese and bacon bits and shit like that. a salad made mostly of actual VEGETABLES.

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

A cheesy ode...

I just have to share this, because it's too good not to.

Miss Cheese and I were exchanging emails today in an effort to nail down a day when we can gather at the Taint (click here for the explanation of that) for lunch, and she composed this:

Fun fun fun-
a burger and no bun

Meet me at the taint please ...
make it right at one

We'll get ourselves some burgers
fries or salads too

Your plate will sport shrooms and brie
mine ... has extra cheese

I'll drink my bun in the form of Stella
alas ... not you ... for fear your bell-ah
will revolt, making your life hella

long lunch long lunch don't go back to work!!
long lunch long lunch that's a manager perk!!

I should add that she managed to come up with this while she was at work. After starting work at 0-dark-hundred.

She's amazing!

(oh, and the subject line on this email exchange she started? "GAH FAH FGAGHA" i crack up every time i see it.)

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

I got nothin'...

But I've been meaning to link this piece for weeks now. It's really interesting. And again makes me grateful that I've not experienced this kind of pressure from family or friends. Or even the community. Yay, San Francisco!

I've written about this subject before. But what I find really astonishing is that people feel so free to judge the childless -- and it's typically the women who bear the brunt of this -- for their decision not to procreate.

Can we not just concern ourselves with our own shit??