Drama...

Ever watch a train wreck? Or, more accurately, watch a misunderstanding in which you played a small but key role slowly (and bafflingly) snowball into something big and messy and hurtful to several people?

Yeah. Now I have.

Then I called my mom to wish her a happy birthday, and we both ended up in tears. Neither of us is speaking to my brother right now, as he's done something utterly heinous and unforgivable. That's a topic for a whole other post. Anyway. The waterworks started when she said it upset her to know that when "she's gone" (a subject that makes me want to plug my ears and sing "lalalalala, can't hear you!") that I won't have any close family to count on. I tell her I've known for years that I can't count on him, ever, and that I have other people in my life that I CAN count on (thank god).

But it's notable that she's touched on one of my big fears. Not only do I not want to even think about life after "she's gone," I worry that I will be alone for the rest of my life. That I'll be one of those older crazy ladies you see talking to anyone and everyone because she has no one else to talk to.

Then, Miss Sassyhair and I went to the theatre last night, to see Berkeley Rep's "Nine Parts of Desire," which is about women in Iraq. It was an amazing piece of solo theatre work, with one actress portraying nine very different people. And oh-so-cheery for a Friday night. I don't think we've ever been so quiet leaving a theatre, ever.

My horoscope didn't warn me that yesterday would be such an emotionally draining day.

But today, I'm listening to the Foo Fighters and U2, the sun is out, and I will be out walking in it soon.
And then I think I'll be making myself a cocktail or four.